Samples of marked assignment

As a mother and a former school teacher, I am very particular about the quality of marked assignments, especially for the learning of languages. If I were to send my own son to an English enrichment class, the tutor MUST be able to address my following concerns even if it is a group class (and of course, I am willing to pay more for such a tuition class because the tutor needs to invest more time and effort beyond the tuition hours to provide such guidance to my child's tuition assignments):  

1. Will my child know which are the grammatical errors that he has made in his tuition assignments and how he can correct them?

2. Will my child know which are the alternative phrases that he can use to make his essays more interesting and appealing to the marker? 

3. Will my child know what has gone wrong in his answers for Written Comprehension? What are the answering techniques that he should have adopted to avoid penalization? 

As such, below is the standard of marking that I have set for myself as a tutor, to address the concerns that parents may have.